Lazy, Hazy Days

Kel's perspicacity (see her comment on previous post) has shown itself keenly astute once again. Rolling into August does bring on a season of doldrums. It's gotten humid, and they keep threatening close to triple-digit heat, though they've been mostly way off on that, due to highly unstable weather patterns coming in from the heartland. Likely the result of all the hail that silly Squirrel had to go and stir up in the Dakotas. Anywho, We've mainly just been laying about the Summer Palace, showing Ourselves to the public on the balcony every now and then to receive the adoring accolades of Our subjects. . .
reading, doing some crosswords, figuring out whether Uruguay is worth conquering, watching the new season of "Project Runway." You know, the usual Imperial Hamster Summer stuff.

They're at it again!

from DailyRecord.co.uk:
Penguin Picked Up After 999 Alert

Jul 24 2008

RESCUERS hunting for the site of a plane crash at sea called off their search - after the casualties turned out to be two inflatable penguins.

Coastguard and lifeboat teams, along with a helicopter, were scrambled after an elderly man reported a light plane had ditched near Fraserburgh, Aberdeenshire. He was convinced he saw wreckage glinting in the sun. But rescuers discovered that what he had spotted were two massive balloons shaped like penguins.

Victor Sutherland, coxswain of Fraserburgh Lifeboat, said: "When we got there, all we found were the penguins. They were pretty large and could easily be seen from the shore. I can understand why he thought they were debris."

The man raised the alarm on Wednesday afternoon when a microlight he had been watching off the coast vanished from view. But the search was called off after the 4ft penguins, which were semiinflated, were discovered. The two penguins - whose source remains a mystery - have now been "adopted" by the lifeboat team.

Mr Sutherland says he does not want the false alarm to put people off calling the Coastguard. He said: "It would have been a costly exercise. But the man did the right thing."

Olympic excitement!

The Antarctic rugby team scrums, getting ready for the Beijing games. Go Black & Whites!!!

Ah Summer!

Now that school is out and all, Kel and the girls can enjoy some mother-daughter bonding and maybe even go out on the town every now and then.

Grooming Behavior

If you think getting the kids up and ready in the morning is tough at your house, you should see what we have to do around here!

Bovine Blimps

Not to be outdone, and inspired by the penguins' unremitting efforts, the cows are now conducting dangerously imprudent experiments with dirigibles. Look out belooooooow!!!

Brave Penguin Test Pilot...

prepares to launch in experimental remote-control flight assistance gear. God's speed, little fella!

Ho hum... (part II)

Another day at work. Pontificates can get a little boring at times. (And no comments about my hat!)

Ho hum...

Another day at work. Sabbaticals can get a little boring at times...

High gas prices...

have finally hit the Vatican, resulting in drastic action.

The Perils of Penguinity

Ya know, living with TR and nearly 100 of his closest relatives has given me a whole new perspective on penguin life. It's not all that easy...

The paparazzi follow you everywhere.

There are all those endless (and largely futile) hours spent in flight school.

Loosing a contact lens is sheer hell.

People give you funny looks when you do interpretive dance.

And there are those periodic bouts with the great existential questions.

Continued. . .

The principles applaud the papal chef for the exceptional weenies.

After-dinner entertainment.: "Hey, watch this! I can do an eclipse!"

A good time was had by all.

Despotic Entertaining Tip #42

During the summer months, a simple relaxed picnic can be just the thing to ease diplomatic tensions. Here, President Bush prepares to chow down at the Pontifical Weenie-Roast.

It's not just us, ya know!

(AP Photo/Mark Humphrey)

Tim Clark of South Africa pulls his penguin head cover off a club during the first round of the Stanford St. Jude Championship golf tournament in Memphis, Tenn., Thursday, June 5, 2008. Clark finished the day at 2-over par 72.

Look Out Cougs!

In one of the stranger coincidences in my life recently, the dean of arts & sciences at my beloved and mighty place of employ - i.e., my "boss" in a way - has just been named provost at, of all places, Washington State Univ., alma mater of our Good and Right-Trusty Squirrel! Let's just say better you than us. One friend and colleague, possessed of strongish feelings toward our dean, threw a big party at the news. She herself was born and spent early years in beauteous Pullman (check out the National Lentil Festival) and threw an eastern WA themed party, complete with cheeses shipped in from the WSU dairy! (impressive, no?)Be assured we will keep Sq.'s alma mater in our thoughts and prayers here. Happily, the new provost comes after Squirrel and will depart before the Little Rodent hits campus, so no personal harm will be effected. Go Cougs!

Resistance is futile!

On our little jaunt through Indiana, it struck me that the place might make a good target for conquest. This for several reasons:

TR rather liked the place.

They do take good care of their cows. Here they are enjoying a sleek, industrial style merry-go-round at one of their bovine amusement parks.

Certainly, it doesn't seem there'll be much resistance on the horizon.
But they do have the oddest looking dogs I've ever seen...

The Miracle of Birth!

On the way to Chicago, we stopped for a tour of the Fair Oaks Dairy in northern Indiana, a set-up specifically designed to make cows less stressed and more comfortable. They certainly seemed to be quite happy and well-adjusted, but it can be hard to tell; they tend to keep their feelings to themselves. Stoic creatures they are. Among the attractions was the birthing barn. Several pregnant cows are brought in daily to deliver before the audience, and I must admit, it was fascinating. Bossie did, however, need a little assistance due to the size of the calf. Behold:
Curiously, from what I've seen on TV and high-school hygiene movies, the process with cows appears much tidier than it is for humans -- well, except for the straps maybe.

With this enlightening and appropriate post, we also say:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY
MR. WOODCHUCK!!!

(Bet they had to use the straps for you too...)

A Teaser

There's something about tomorrow that makes woodchucks stand up and take notice. . . .

Know Your Poultry!

The chicken goes: "Cluck, cluck."

The dodo goes: "¿Dónde está la fiesta?"

¡Hola!

¿Dónde está la fiesta?
I hear there's gonna be big doin's next week in the great northwest. So I'm trying to impress Hamster with my knowledge of Mexican culture, hoping he'll send me as his official representative

Pase el tequila, por favor.

Due to fatigue...

and a certain flagship state university not willing to release me from its clutches even though the semester is over, We are prevented from updating this blog at the present time. In the meanwhile, please enjoy this closely related post at another blog. Thank you for your attention and patience.

-- by Decree of The Hamster

It's Derby Day!

A very big and very fun day here in our all-glorious Commonwealth! Even I'll admit it almost makes living here worthwhile. Though I have the feeling the Imperial Hamster Steed & Jockey this year might not have been a good investment...
"And theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey're off!!!"

Finals Week

The blood-curdling screams and soul-wrenching sighs you've probably been hearing from Iowa to Washington is just me grading papers and exams. Which also explains why there hasn't been a post in a while. Pity me...

Odds 'n Ends

Domestic Bliss!

We commissioned the Imperial Hamster Court Painter to render the new Mommy happily ensconced at home with her bundle of joy! Squirrel couldn't make it to pose since he was up to his ears in dirty diapers. Love ya, Mom!

Latest News!

Mrs. Squirrel and Baby Squirrel return home. Baby slept well first night. Film at 11:00. . .

It happened!!!

There's a new little rodent at Rogue Squirrel!!! Woohoo!!!

A new courtier

We have a new arrival at court! A charming and courteous marmot apparently from somewhere out west, eager to be of service to Our Imperial Rodentine Person.
I'm certain he's of sterling character and will prove loyal and devoted. Still, where he actually came from and how he came here appears to be a bit of a mystery. Likely I'm just a little paranoid. Most despots are, ya know...