19 August 2007

The Road to Conquest - Part 1

As some may have seen elsewhere, here I am in front of my advance command HQ at Pateley Bridge in Yorkshire. In addition to its strategic location, the town boasts a bakery with excellent custard tarts and the best espresso machine in all England.


It was also necessary to secure local provisioning. Nothing but the best for The Hamster's Invincible Warriors! As Napoleon said, "An army travels on its stomach," and luscious, authentic Wensleydale cheese hits just the right spot for the hungry legionnaire!

Of course, there were numerous other necessities that had to be attended to, such as inspecting the troop trains. We gave that job to DG.

Since he is a native Yorkshireman, We appointed our right trusty Bert as majordomo, in charge of the logistics of the Imperial Hamster Court whilst on maneuvers. The fiendish Scots, as it turns out, sent out their feared commando battalions of RABBITS mounted on TRACTORS to attempt to ambush the Imperial Progress and impede our march northward. Our good Bert deftly managed to fend off the attack by the dreaded RABBITS and TRACTORS and saved Our Rodentine Person from the greatest peril!

In recognition of such faithful and selfless service,
WE hereby deign and create
Our Right Trusty & Most Loyal Minion
MR. BERT
Imperial Hamster Minister of Education
&
First Overseer of Schools
and bestow upon him the added title and dignity of
Marquess of Harrogate
Viscount of Giggleswich
Baron of Hawes

--by decree of The Hamster

7 comments:

  1. It is about time for a report from the frontlines.

    TR

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  2. Those first photos are so incredibly beautiful I almost cried. I can't wait to some day go there. Actually, I wouldn't mind living in Yorkshire.

    Sigh....

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  3. You are just on a roll, aren't you?

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  4. enjoyed the pictures!

    blah, blah, blah . . .

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  5. I keep checking back for part 2 . . .

    you would think this was the start of a new semester or something

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  6. Coming within the next day or two. There's a pic I need from DG in order to make the experience as formidable as possible, Stay tuned - there are at least 2 more lavishly illustrated updates coming.

    - Wicked I, King of Scotland & the Isles

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